Feeling brain meltdown happening. Too many sleepless nights to count now, I have decided today to wear myself out, thereby leaving me with no option but sleep when I retire to my bed.
I decided therefore not just to walk home from work, oh no. but instead to walk home a very long scenic route way home. From my office near Goodge Street I decided to walk to camden, have a little look around and then walk back home via the canal.
It started off so well. I got to camden in good time and had a little wander around, forgetting how much I used to love this part of London, but haven’t been there for a while and although I still love it we’ve drifted apart and that spark isn’t there anymore, but I’ll go back for some drunken times and in the morning we’ll both regret it because it hurts. But in the middle of the night it feels so right. And then tomorrow morning. Oh. Oh, then you come down.
I decide to leave the pain and jump down the steps near the Dev (that’s the Devonshire Arms for you non goths) and start to triptrap down the canal like a billy goat gruff.
After leaving the busy canal people, goths and drug dealers near camden I am left in the peacefulness of the canal … only feet away from the business of kings cross and yet my only company is some ducks and a couple of cyclists zipping past. It is nice and relaxing how could I fail to sleep after a night like htis.
Dusk starts to set on the canal, it is beautiful. But unlike the rest of London there are no streetlights to wobble themselves to on. It is getting dark, I still have about ten mins of walking left, my legs are tired and suddenly there are scary people sat on every bench, just appearing because of the lack of light. Not goths, no, they are not scary. These are scary people drink scary lager and wearing scary jackets that I swear were cool when I was at school.
My lovely relaxedness evaporated and I walked quicker (not so quick as to look scared) even the ducks had fucked off.
If I got mugged/attacked/raped/pointed at/hooted at with sneery derision here then there’s no one to hear me scream, or find the body.
I finally made it home, the walk had taken an hour and a half and I was now really on edge with fear.
I had some food and watched some telly, I was exhausted. I fell asleep on the sofa for an hour, thereby resetting my body clock. And by 2am I was still wide, wide awake…