Not having a fantastic day today. Slightly hungover, very tired and a bit down from a notso great gig last night. Plus nerves for tonihgts biggie of a Quarter Final compettion gig means that I know from the moment I get up the day is going to be wasted.
Even setting myself relatively minor tasks; put some washing on, hoover, wash up… seem to be immpossible. So within hours of getting up I’m settled on the sofa with a duvet and a couple of pillows for a lazy sunday afternoon in front of the telly.
One would think that on days like today cable wold be an absolute lifesaver. But no.
For some reason it STILL surprises me, but there is nothing on, even worse, nearly every channel seems to be perpetually stuck on adverts…I hate all advertising at the best of times, but it’s made worse to see the same baby’s arse being wiped time and time and time and time again, it must be a paedophiles joy
Even the history and Discovery channels let me down, it was one of the rare times that I oculd have happily sat and watched an hour documentary on Nazis or big ships… or Nazis with big ships. But not for me today… dull
dull
dull…
Finally I stop on uktv People…they are showing some Jeremy Clarkson. …and it’s not new. In fact, it seems to be a showing (perhaps, oh joyous me a premiere) of the videos that he churns out for the Christmas Market that you’ll always find in the Woolworths Bargain Bin for £2 by January.
This one is called “Clarkson Unleashed” and is about him trying to find the worst car. Now, I’ve becoming a VERY begrudging Clarskon fan in recent months. I don’t know why, I hate him. And yet, he makes me laugh. I’m no fan of cars, and yet I find that I can watch him talk about them.
I’ve been watching the new top Top Gear on BBC1 of late. I’m enjoying it. But this, this video relase thing is about 10 years old, his hair is bigger, his presting style..more, well…shit and the cars, even to a layman like me, that are “modern” are now hideously outdated.
What makes it even better is that I’ve noticed some really not bad directing in the little filmed segments for new top gear, nice camerawork, filters and things. But in this. It’s awful. Every shot of a car is accompanied by MOR guitar solos or drum machines. And the cars ALWAYS sweep under a cameras mounted somewhere. Lots of upside down camera shots and bad graphics.
In short, I loved it and was happily entertained for the full hour
Then checking the schedules, they were showing more of these videos…for the whole afternoon in fact
The other problem with Clarkson is that the way he ttalks is very… infectious. He’s a very assertive man, using stupid metaphors, a bit like a donkey…in a volkswagon. And the other thing he says something, does a puase…And then ends in with and assertive statement in a higher pitch.
I find me asking my flatmate if I want a…cup of tea.
I’m very worried that I’ll do the gig tonight in the voice of Clarkson. And Clarkson to comedy is a bit like, well…a badger caught in a minefield.