Today I had lunch with my flatmate, Oscar. It became worthy of at least being one of the more dull episodes of 24.
My name is Jack Bauer and today is the longest lunch of my life…
Though not in minutes – after my crapness at temping I have to be pretty careful not to go over the hour or I get the tut, and I’m working with anality at its core. Every second I’m late is logged on a spreadsheet.
Now, when most people go to lunch at one they will have already chosen the eatery in which to spend the next hour.
Not us. By the time we meet it is already 5 past. I have 55 mins left and counting ,
We spy a café place with burgers – but at £6 a shot I fear slightly out of my price range, despite the fact they are made of kangaroos, sharks and politicians (guess the odd one out – kangaroos are the only cute ones). But as my budget for everything for the next 10 days is 20 quid – I think it is a bit steep for lunch.
We wonder around Soho’s finest, a greasy spoon is surely the answer, big breakfast, quick and only a fiver. We spot a café. We sit inside the café. We look at the menu – this is more expensive than the kangaroo – and it’s only farm animals.
Outside we go. Only 35 minutes left of lunch
Tick, tock, tick ,tock
He informs me of the famous pie bar – we can get a pie – I like pies. They are cheap and filling and good for you (ish)
Obviously we didn’t think that the famous pie bar serving only pies won’t sell them for the same price as Greggs the bakers. (who don’t sell pies, just pasties and sausage rolls, but the comparison still works). But I wasn’t expecting them to be £7.50 each.
So we settle for pub lunch, but now to our horror discover that we haven’t the time. So a sandwich and a coffee and ten minutes of catching breath before back to work for a break.
Think it would have made 24 more believable….